Ok y'all. Can I just share how GOOD and PURPOSEFUL and AWESOME God is?!?
It's only been about a month and a half since my dad went to be with the Lord, but wow. God is so good and doesn't waste anything. Conversations I would have never had with people are happening, being more intentional to pray for others and my family, and just how God constantly reminds me of His abundant lovingkindness towards me and His grace and peace.
The other night I was sitting in bed and I picked up my journal. As I started writing, I was curious to see if I had written anything the year before. Exactly a year ago I had written a prayer for both of my parents, that they would grow more in love with each other and more in love with the Lord and that Christ would just be in every part of their marriage.
I noticed more joy and love in my parents' marriage in the last year of my dad's life and that there was true enjoyment and lots of laughter, all the while my dad's tumor was probably growing inside him.
I turned even further to see if I had written anything 2 years before, but my journal had started on April 2012. That day was filled with prayers of thanksgiving and praise because the tumor that was found in my dad's brain was benign and not cancerous.
That whole story just gives me chills now because as I look back, I can see an even bigger thing happening.
When my dad had his brain tumor and there were many uncertainties. God answered my prayer in a way that I couldn't really understand until now. You can read about that story here. (and his response below that post is just so great) Yes, God healed him of that tumor and was faithful to answer my prayer in that moment, but our God is not a God who is confined to our timeframe or any time for that matter. Our God sees the whole picture, not just one piece. Because my dad had that tumor, I began to see the frailty of life here on earth. I began to think about what it would be like to lose someone very close to me. I began to be more intentional with my dad in conversations and being more patient with him. I didn't want to take my dad for granted.
Those 2 years were a blessing from God. Who would have known that just two years later he would be diagnosed with cancer. I praise God for giving us that time, for those 2 years that God helped me love my dad with more intentionality and allowed me to experience more of his love in return. I am so thankful that God doesn't waste any of our sorrow, any of our pain, any of our suffering. He is purposeful in every way. He truly does work all things for our good and HIS GLORY!
And He is worthy of all the glory friends! I'm just overwhelmed by His sovereignty and goodness. No, my prayer wasn't answered in the exact way I expected, but I have a hope and peace that I can trust my Lord and my God with everything.
And THAT is what God has so graciously revealed to me in the last couple of days.
overwhelmed by the goodness and mercies of our Lord,
lisa
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Saturday, January 4, 2014
Dad, with love.
Today was a celebration of my dad's life. Not only remembering my dad and who he was, but Who he lived for. I don't feel like the English words "thank you" expresses how grateful I am to friends and family that came to the service. I was completely blown away to see so many friends there, even ones I hadn't seen in a very long time! What an incredible blessing from the Lord! I had the privilege to speak at my dad's service, and the following is what the Lord laid on my heart.
However, I consider my
life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the
task the Lord Jesus has given me- the task of testifying about the wonderful
good news of God’s grace. Acts 20:24
I don’t think there is just “one word” to sum up my dad. He
was so many things to so many people he encountered throughout his life. He was
funny, caring, dedicated, faithful, hard working, humble, and the list goes on.
My dad didn’t know a stranger and made every person he talked to feel important
and valued- which was a lot because he loved to talk to people! I’m sure he’s
seeing a lot of people in heaven right now that he maybe met only briefly in
his lifetime, but somehow greatly impacted!
My dad deeply loved his family. Looking through some of his
drawers and dressers there were pictures of cousins, aunts and uncles, and us
kids everywhere. Even though most of them were old pictures, he never took them
down. He cherished every card, and I mean every
card from us, whether handmade cards from my brother, sweet cards from my
sister, or corny birthday cards from me, they were still all hanging up at his
desk. Even a poem my brother and I wrote for him in the 3rd grade
was still hanging up by his desk! I know he thought about us a lot and loved us
so well. He’d call from work ‘just to talk’, even just for 10 minutes,
encourage us with a verse, or even sing us a song. My sweet, sweet mama and
daddy shared 35 years together and have been such a testimony of faithfulness
and unconditional love. Lovers through thick and thin.
My dad never forced us to be anybody we weren’t. He
encouraged us in our extracurricular activities- no matter what they were. And
even though he wasn’t always able to be there because of his job, his words of
encouragement and telling us how proud he was always meant so much. His love
was completely unconditional and never got upset if we didn’t get 1st
place or “win” or whatever the case, he was just so proud of us for going out
there and doing our best. His smile and hugs were worth more than any medal or
ribbon received.
My dad’s life was never about himself. I know my family can
all recall countless times of my dad’s generosity, even when it didn’t seem
like he had much to give. I remember one time he passed by a man on the side of
the road while I was in the car with him. He mentioned something about going
back and talking to him, and I was begging him not to because that meant he
would be talking to this stranger for at least 30 minutes and that’s just not
what I wanted to do! Well, of course,
he turned the car around, drove back, and parked near where the man was. We got
out of the car and my dad gave him some food he had in the back of the car. I
can’t remember the conversation or even how long it was, but I’m sure he talked
to that man about Jesus. He wasn’t about to let that man go without a Bible and
the Gospel presented! He even picked up a kid waiting outside in the hot summer
heat and gave him a ride where he needed to go. My dad taught me so much about
compassion and generosity that I will never forget.
My dad worked hard for our family. He never sought the
recognition or praise of man over that of the Lord’s and was a true example of doing all things without complaining.
When others would have quit or thrown in the towel, gotten upset and felt sorry
for themselves, my dad chose to persevere and endure, to choose joy and praise
the Lord. When any other dad might be closed off and want to be alone after
long hours of work, my dad was rejuvenated by spending time with us and loving
on us.
Not only was his love of family so evident, but his love of
the Lord shined brighter than anything else. His Bible would always be open at
his place at the table. He wasn’t ashamed to lift his hands high, jump around,
and shout praises of joy to the Lord. He wasn’t ashamed to walk up to complete
strangers and hand them a small Bible and some snacks. He wasn’t ashamed of the
Gospel- The Good News that gave him the very life he lived. Romans 1:16 says “For I am not ashamed of the Gospel, for it
is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes…” That seemed to
be my dad’s life verse… among many others! He lived by the truth of God’s word!
The grace and love of Christ poured out from his heart, and he was a true testimony
of a faithful, humble servant. He would pray these verses over me as he tucked
me in at night, ones I will never forget:
The Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord make His face to shine upon
you, and be gracious to you. The Lord lift up His countenance on you, and give
you peace.
Numbers 6:24-26
There may not be “one word” to sum up my dad, but if there
was one thing my dad lived for, One Person he lived for, it was Jesus Christ.
Yes, he loved us very much. He loved others so well and put them before
himself. But all of that was just an overflow of his love and passion for
Jesus.
Looking back on his life these last couple of weeks with
family and friends, and reflecting on my dad’s last months, I see even more
clearly how my dad lived for things of eternal value. He truly saw each moment
as a gift, definitely didn’t rush through life, and really lived each day as if
it were his last. My dad was full of life and shared Life with others.
I am so comforted knowing that he is in heaven now, partying
with Jesus and the angels, pain and cancer free, never having to be rushed
through a conversation again because he has all eternity! He probably had the
biggest welcoming party at the gates as he heard the words from the Lord: “Well
done, My good and faithful servant”. I’m sad because I miss him, but I have
such joy and peace knowing that Romans 8:18 is true: “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy
to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” And I know my
dad is basking in the glory of God right now, where he was always meant to be.
still joyfully praising,
lisa
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Bienvenidos 2014!
First off, I want to say a HUGE thank you to friends and family that prayed for my dad, and continue to pray for my family, and me. Your prayers and words of encouragement have been felt, despite whatever distance is between us. The body of Christ is amazing! I know my dad is enjoying looooong, lovely conversations with lots of people and as my Tia Nancy said, he is singing in God's heavenly choir with gusto! So, despite 2013 ending quite differently than I ever imagined, God is still good and I am resting in His goodness as this New Year begins.
Looking back at my 2013 NewYear's goals, this is what I wrote:
Looking back at my 2013 NewYear's goals, this is what I wrote:
- grow in the fruit of the Spirit
- read the rest of my mystery series
- run a half marathon... or 2
- work out. just do something
- be better at budgeting and saving
- be better at keeping in touch with others
- blog more? (there was literally a question mark there... I guess I wasn't too sure about that one)
- read 1 classic book
- invite people over for dinner
I would say I had pretty good goals in mind. Did I remember that I wrote those? Nope! I'm pretty sure I hadn't looked at those since the day I wrote them. However, I did accomplish some of those things this past year!
Obviously, growing in the fruit of the Spirit is a lifelong goal, so I can't say that I am there quite yet.
I actually re-started my mystery series from the beginning and JUST finished the last book I had already read... which means THIS year I will be starting to read the rest of the series!
I did run a half marathon with my sister, so that was fun. Mike and I have already signed up for the BCS half next December, so that one is a for sure this year as well!
Sooo... hopefully since I've signed up for another half marathon I will continue to work out in some shape or form. One can only hope.
As far as budgeting goes, I just downloaded YNAB (You Need a Budget), so we are trying something new this year. Hopefully this will help us budget and save, especially since Mike is back in school and we have more loans to pay off. Our goal is to pay off my small loan this year. Let's see if we can do it!
I think I did a fair job of keeping in touch with others. Haven't been too great on the bookface, but I have stayed in contact with friends.
I'm not sure if I blogged more or not... maybe that question mark was there for good reason!
Hmm... classic book. Did I read a classic this past year? Ummm... I honesty don't remember. I know I read books, just can't think if any were classics or not. This year Mike and I have cleared out one of the shelves on our bookshelf to add any books we read during this year to see how many we come up with. This should be fun!
And I think I can recall at least 3 times inviting people over for dinner this year! So, that's like, 1 invite every 4 months! Yeah! I could probably be better about that too. I think we could handle once a month!
Some of these past year's goals will stay the same and just continue on into 2014, but I think I'll add some more.
2014 Goals:
- Spend more time with family (talking on the phone, dinner, visiting, emails, etc)
- Pay off one of my small school loans
- FINISH my mystery series
- practice guitar at least once every week
- keep a list of those that I am praying for and pray for them often!
- finish reading the Bible all the way through for the 2nd time (currently half-way there!)
- continue to grow in the fruit of the Spirit!
- blog more?... yeah, let's just keep that one on there. It's a goal. If I put it on the list it might happen, but if it's not on the list, it probably definitely won't happen... right?! :)
I think that should do. (Don't want to overwhelm myself from Day 1!) Do I think I'll remember all these come July 23rd? Probably not. But maybe you can help keep me accountable with these things. What are your New Year's resolutions/goals?
Happy New Year!
lisa
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